heaven knows

my life in grey

And here comes the near finale of semester break. Blegh~!! This reminds me that I haven't done much actually. Mostly doing SRC stuff and also lazing around...and TRYING to lose weight. Minimal succession.

Orientation is almost over too. This has got to be the biggest amount of students I've seen for May orientation. Turn up was quite good for admin briefing, mass call and Welcome Freshmen Concert. Tomorrow will be the ice breaking session. So far I heard that I'm going to get drenched by the committee. Hmm.... We'll see what happens tomorrow. Lol.

But... I think this orientation has its own share of surprising incidents. Lol.. It has been good no doubt. Other than the spastic-like speakers...others are definitely fine.

Fuhh~!! Now entering Final Year a.k.a. Year 3!!

2 more events to go before I officially step down. Hoping that I can make them as memorable as possible.

THIS HAS GOT TO BE ONE OF THE HOTTEST SEASONS I HAVE EXPERIENCED!!!

Woah...final week of the so called holidays. The miserable 2 and half weeks just flashed by with me doing practically nothing. Yay!!

I seriously need to slap myself to make myself believe that I'm going into Year 3!! Final year!! Oh no!! How did I come so far?? Hmm.... actually when I was in 1st year, I never thought of making so far. I thought I was going to give up somewhere in Year 2 when it gets tough and when reality bites me in the neck. But... the journey continues....

Hmm... I think on and off, we do need to take a look back. Look at where we came from and how far we've gotten now. Learn from the past to make sure that we never repeat any stupidities (as quoted from a friend). And I do realise that I've come quite a long way. Heck...I didn't even think I would become Chairman of the Student Council for my own campus. So, it's a pretty big leap for me.

Now that my term as chairman is almost over, I guess I wouldn't do anything to change things even if I had the chance to go back and change things. No doubt, there are bitter sweet moments. But all-in-all, the experience was great. From getting to know more people, finding new friendships to gaining experiences in so many things that classes could never have thought. Of course, it gave me a chance to get a taste of the harsh reality of working life. Duh...

Well, I hope I did good for my term in the eyes of my campus' students. I can safely say that I did the best I could to help make a change in my own campus.

In 2 years time, I went from a person who stepped into the uni that doesn't want anything else but to just study and be a nerd...to a person who went all out to strive for changes. And of course, I did what I KNOW is right. Not what I THINK is right. So yeah...there you go. Of course, I had added pressure and stress too!! Everyone knows how to complain about us not doing anything. Then who's going to make up for all my added pressure and stress? And failings? Crap...

Besides all the junk above....

Kris Allen won!!!
Yes, I believe he deserves every bit of it no matter what other people say that Adam Lambert should've won.

Just some pics from the previous day trip to Gold Coast Sepang, a.k.a. Crab Land.
And the rest can't be uploaded thanks to blogger for jamming up everytime I try to upload a photo.

Oh sweet holidays....with nothing better to do.

To update from Tuesday...

Right after our last paper (the finale), and after getting all our stuff done in Uni, Edna and myself went for a movie in 1u. For starters, we have no clue what movie to watch because we're so outdated with what movie is out and all. By looking at the list of movies in GSC, we finally decided on "Coming Soon". It was entirely MY FAULT!!! I initially thought it was an English film, made in the US or whatever and it wouldn't be that scary. I only heard that it was a horror film... To our wonderful amazement, it was a freaking THAI HORROR FILM!!! I screwed both of us over!!! Oh what the....

Anyways, we sat through the movie. Edna was braver than me...showing her Exophthalmus (protruding eyes) while watching and me using my jacket to cover half of my vision. 1st time ever I'm watching a Thai horror film and the VERY VERY LAST!! Especially in a cinema. And guess what? The movie is based on a vengeful spirit haunting the cinema. What COINCIDENCE!!! So yeah, we scared the crap out of ourselves. Lucky for us, we're too tired on that day that we just fall straight to sleep at night without thinking back about the movie.


***

We took a road trip on Wednesday... To Gold Coast Sepang and then detoured off to Port Dickson for a while. I can't remember how many left turns we took that day. We named it the "Left Turn Day". It took us forever to reach Gold Coast Sepang. And the very smart me, skipped breakfast. I literally starved all the way there till I gave up and surrendered to Chicken Rice. Well, it could have been worse. I gave ideas such as sticking our heads out the window to EAT AIR and things like eating grass

Someone... was busy screaming in Gold Coast Sepang because she's afraid of CRABS!!! All the tiny little crabs!! It was pretty interesting, to me at least, at how many crabs there were around. And the water was rather far away 'cause it's low tide. It's not like Port Dickson where the water is always quite far up.

Besides the place being windy 'cause it's a seaside, there's nothing special about it. You can't go into the water unless you want to walk for a distance out towards the water. It's a long walk...trust me. Although it looks near (yeah, just keep telling yourself that it's near to make yourself feel better).

And who would've thought, that I'd be all the way there to tell a kid to "Shut the F*** up". Yeah, I did. What good would it do to him to keep calling out to us to go near to him?? Would it land him free sex at such an age? I doubt that his hormones are even rising at that age. So yeah, my advice to that kid would be.... Get a dick 1st before calling out to girls that way. (I can't help it. The truth always hurt. That's life)

Reality check: Gold Coast Sepang is a rebrand of MORIB BEACH!!! Wake up people!!!


***

Met up with Grace yesterday. Talked about some ol' time stuffs and life and uni. Simply amazing how we can still remember things that's happen. Oh wait...that's 'cause they're all the stuff that happened during the "black period". Who wouldn't remember? I'll remember it for the whole world. And yes, I agree, that once bitten, twice shy. I'll remember it enough to know that I probably won't find forgiveness now for those people who're involved.

I try to forgive but it's not enough to make it all ok


Other than that, for those sibuk people who still think that I might still be hooked to the past idiot, sorry to say... I'm over and done and moved on long time ago. My head's in the future now, not the past. Reminiscing the past will only teach me what I should do in the future.

Some times I really don't understand. What is the whole point of trying to hide and avoid? Is the world that big that we'll never ever bump into each other? And is it necessary to push yourself 6 feet under to get people to notice you and then what? You munch off from their pity towards you? That's awfully pathetic. Especially for a person who claim that you trust and have faith in God.

***

Current status:......
Now, I'm busy.... trying to stay away from being addicted. =p
Addicted to what/who/where?? That's for me and a few to know and others to never to find out.

Year 2 Semester 2 Finals are OFFICIALLY over!!!
*fuh* relieved.... after all the draggy-ness, it has finally ended with a "splash".

Yesterday was a very "interesting" day. What made it more interesting was that, it's the day before my last paper.

I had a meeting scheduled with UTAR President yesterday. It could have been on the 13th, which is tomorrow, but thanks to *someone*, it HAD to be on the 11th. And to add salt to the damn wound, that *someone* did not even show up for the damn meeting. How f***ing good is that? I would expect that some notification could have been given even on that day itself to postpone the meeting. But NO..... I still had to use up my study time to get my @** there to only find out that those people who are darn free with no more exams are absent.
So yes, it was a cherry on top of a chocolate cake.

Then, when I'm trying to use up every minute of my time to make them count for studying, some unforseen stuff happened.
My book rack which was placed on top of my study table, came crashing down. And, it gave me a shock of my life that every bit of stuff that I've studied for my final subject just went *poof* out of my brains. And, some of the books fell down and hit my fat boy who was sleeping on the floor near the table. My poor fat boy.... Sigh.

The thing is, that happened at around 3.45am and my exam was at 9am. What the crap!!! Such good timing to have all information pop out of your brains. Thanks to the nice "shock", I couldn't sleep at all too.

And when it came to this morning, my stomach just had to go against me by coming up with gastric. Oh....the devil of all stomach problems. It was just "lovely" as I feel all the gastric juice a.k.a. Hydrochloric Acid slowly burn my stomach wall/lining when I'm thinking of the answers to the questions and busy writing them down while holding on to my stomach like it was going to rip open and burst out with God knows what. It definitely wasn't FUNNY!!!

No doubt, this semester has caused a marked increase in my insanity level. Kudos to that~

Now...to plan for all the upcoming stuff/events... urgh

Everything is happening at one go.

First of all, is of course, finals...which is coming to an end on Tuesday. Thank God for that.

Then, the opening of my dad's shop tomorrow. Yup, all the preparations came at the wrong timing. I'm spending all my time helping out with the shop's stuff and left with no time to study for my last paper. I'm still stuck at the 2nd chapter. May the Protein and Proteomics final paper have mercy on me and my sanity...

Then, my grandma got admitted into the hospital few days ago. It's sad to see that she can't even get up and she keeps vomitting out everything she's eaten. It kills me even more when she tells me and my mom that she knows she'll never be able to get up and walk again. Seeing her in pain is really heartbreaking. Knowing that I can't do anything is worse.

I need to....breathe and pray that God will take control.

At last, 1 more paper to go before the REAL finale. Today's just a small dose of the upcoming short-term freedom.

You have no idea how crazy this time's final was. Just the beginning stretch of paper was good enough to demotivate and simultaneously kill me on the spot. I've yet to pick up my brains. The constant 24/7 studying, not moving my a** from the chair till I'm done, an average of 3 or 4 hours sleep a day... I'm really made out of steel. Plus, I'm a free "kuli" for my family to do work in the shop. I don't know how, but I'm doing it. Even I am amazed at myself for this semester.

Well, exams are a *toot*. Nothing else can explain it better than that. I think this semester has been the craziest so far out of all my 4 semesters put together. All those crap that school teachers tell the form sixers about Uni life being easier for them once they come out from STPM is plain bull****. I don't think so unless you go to a damn government university which you learn nuts in BM.

Now... I really want to faint, drop dead and dead sleep. Also, I need to find a way to fix/salvage/regenerate my brains for my last paper. And... I need to make plans for the upcoming holidays to get away and reclaim myself (the one before all the exams and stress crap).

So this is me signing off to go faint/drop dead/sleep.....

I have managed to alter a song....based on the song "I Miss You Like Crazy - Moffatts".
It goes....

... i HATE IMMUNO like crazy,
even more than words can say,
i HATE IMMUNO like crazy,
every minute of every day,
i don't wanna fail immuno
and i don't wanna go kampar
i HATE YOU,
HATE YOU,
HATE YOU..
i HATE IMMUNO like crazy...
There...my "wonderful" rendition which is dedicated to Immunology by Dr. *** and Dr. ****. After reading about 18 chapters of Immunology, I definitely/confirm hallucinated at 3am this morning.
Why?? 'Cause I started hearing weird sounds coming from downstairs when there's no one there. Plus, I heard some bells ringing kind of sound (not the normal ice cream bells or temple-used bells kind). And then I heard footsteps up the stairs when both my parents are asleep in their own room and never left their room in the 1st place. Yes... I just conclude that I am hallucinating to save my own sanity and peace of mind... maybe.
And out of nowhere, I have an inflamed region nearing my ankle which I just spotted just now.
And out of nowhere, I started to feel pain in my knee again.
And out of nowhere, I have rash marks on my arm when I don't remember seeing it there yesterday.
And out of nowhere, my brain died
*obituary to my poor brains. I never managed to pick them back up from the floor after today's paper.
Now I need to study about brain activity and what not in Neurobiology when my own brain is fried. ~Yay!! Joy to the world... Joy to the fishes in the deep blue sea... Joy to Neurobiology.... NOT!!!~
Okay, back to self-indulgence into my notes.